what do u mean i don’t have a social life I just went grocery shopping with my mom
the perks of being an ugly piece of shit
(Source: saticfy, via crunchier)
me auditioning to model
(Source: humorking, via perks-of-being-chinese)
I wanna do dirty stuff with u like farming
(Source: evaunit08, via frosted)
" I think we’ll skip on the pizza tonight and have a home cooked meal"
You know what to do with that big fat butt…
Please sit down. We’re trying to get information about this murder you witnessed.
I have so many ugly pictures of my friends purely stored for revenge
(Source: skittlevodka, via crunchier)
if trees could talk i’d probably get emotionally attached to them
Friends who bring up embarrassing things you did a long time ago
i hate it when you go out with your friends but no one bothers to tell you that you look like a grape
(Source: , via perks-of-being-chinese)
do you wanna have sex?
c) a + b
if u see me smiling in public it means im laughing at the jokes i tell myself in my head
(Source: petewanks, via frosted)